By Duong Huynh 
My old keeper gloves finally gave up last weekend during our league match – the left palm ripped clean off on a dive, and that’s how we lost 2-1. Figured it’s time to shop around proper.
The hunting begins
Started by hitting up three local sports stores after work Tuesday. First place had only two models, both felt like cheap plastic. Salesdude kept saying “great latex bro” while I’m poking flimsy foam that wouldn’t catch a beach ball. Walked out empty-handed.
Second shop was better. Tried on four different pairs right there in the aisle. Made weird grabbing motions at soccer balls hanging from the ceiling while the cashier stared. Best one had solid padding but made my fingers feel like sausages. Almost bought them just to end the hunt.
Testing phase drama
Borrowed two models from my teammate Chris who’s gear-crazy. Took them to Thursday night practice. First pair had this insane sticky grip when dry – caught everything – but turned into greased butter during our water break sprinklers test. Ball slipped clean through twice. Felt like clapping with wet dish gloves.
Second borrowed pair had thick padding. Saved my palms during concrete-like dives on our crap training field but couldn’t feel the ball at all. Like trying to text through oven mitts.
Online gamble
Ordered three top-rated ones from different brands after reading forums til 2am. The mailman hates me now. Tried them sequentially during Saturday morning pickup games:
- Adidas Predator: Immediate love. Fingers moved natural, latex hugged the ball. Wrist strap actually stayed tight. But after two hours the foam started bubbling. $90 down the drain in two sessions
- Nike Vapor Grip: Felt like wearing clouds. Crazy lightweight but zero protection. Took a knuckle shot that made me see stars. Now collecting dust in my trunk
- Uhlsport Absolutgrip: Awkward stiff fit at first. Needed two games to break in. Then magic happened – perfect wet/dry grip balance. Took some brutal finger jams without damage
Final rankings after blood/sweat test
Based on beating these up for weeks:
5. Store brand cheapos: Only if you’re desperate. Will self-destruct faster than birthday balloons
4. Puma Ultra: Great for dry summer games then becomes a slip n slide
3. Nike Premier: Tank-level durable but trades off all grip for padding
2. Adidas Predator Edge: King of first impressions but costs too much for how quick they die
1. Uhlsport Absolutgrip: The grumpy old man glove – rough start but outlives the flashy newcomers
Ended up keeping the Uhlsports as daily drivers. My only advice? Skip “promotion” gloves. That glossy $150 pair won’t save you when it’s pouring rain and you’re facing a penalty.
yadanarbon 